Living the altered life

Its not your fault

Then why am I blaming myself?

Separate what you need to repent for from the things that you have no control over.

Its not your fault

The lies are deadly and oppressive. The pain from arthritis as my muscles break down down putting more and more pressure on my joints is excruciating. Getting out of bed in the morning takes more energy and courage than I feel I have.

Its not your fault

The pain is so prevalent that it is causing life altering changes I never expected to be making at 24. I'm seeking medical and chiropractic solutions for pain that most of the individuals my age never even think about. I have to consider whether I take the stairs or find an elevator not out of laziness but out of necessity. My pride won't let me go there quite yet, but a wheelchair exists in my future.

Its not your fault

But on top of the pain, Satan is so good at shaming me into giving up. To accept the pain as something I deserve. To believe that what is happening to me is in someway tied to my sin. The subtle lie that my mistakes are the reasons for a genetic disease that slowly deteriorates my muscles.

This is not your fault

God knew all of this would happen before I was ever born. He did not cause, nor does rejoice in my pain. He is taking what Satan meant for evil, and using it for good. I'm experiencing how personally the Enemy hates the Children of God.

Its not my fault. I had no control of this. God allowed it, but He promises full redemption. And humility and courage means risking seeking help from others. It means seeking help while resting fully on the sufficiency of God's grace.

It is what gets me out of bed in the morning. Its why I can honestly testify that my Father is loving and kind and enough in ALL things.

My grace is sufficient for you. My power made perfect in weakness

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that the power of Christ may rest on me.